I am not married.
Despite the fact that I have two kids and a committed relationship with the same man for 8 years...I am not married. Nor will I be. i have no plans to be married nor does my partner.
For me, the is nothing that a legal document can change anything for me. i will not be more of a mate of a better mommy. I will not change my name or my status in society. Our I's are dotted and our T's are crossed. We have insurance policies and health care. I have all the papers documented. So why would I get married? Let me think about that.
I have been asked many times when we will marry. Too many to count.
Do you want me to marry for religious reasons? If so, give me those reasons and I will think about it.
My relationship with my partner is not one of either one of us dying to make it all "legal." I admit, there was a time that I thought we would and I truly wanted it. But a lot has happened in these eight years that has me to believe nothing would change. Being married doesn't make people stay together. Commitment, compromise, devotion. That's what keeps my family together. Some of you who read this are married. Perhaps not your first marriage. Being a couple is never easy 100% of the time. and a ceremony will not change that.
We are a family, the four of us. Nothing, nothing will ever change that.
I'm a girl, I'm a boy
And the goddess meant for me only joy
And real love requires you, give up those loves
Whom you think you love best
Love puts you through the test
And only loyal love will be me happiness
-Sinead O-Connor
Peace Out
2 comments:
Well-said.
Documents don't generate loyalty - just liability.
Sending much bloglove your way,
Frances
I am catching up on your blog. Just came today (1/31/08) for the first time!
BUT well said! I agree with you 110%, though I am married (we adopted our second and needed that legal paper) and have been with this man 17 years.
A piece of paper doesn't seem to stop people!
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